Hawkeye
As a kid, I never liked M*A*S*H. That melancholy theme tune and the khaki-and-sand visuals switched me right off.
What a stupid kid!
I’m watching the show now, at last. I can’t believe (a) how good it is, (b) how much of it there is, and, (c) where Hawkeye has been all my life.
I think I’m a little bit in love with him. As well as actually finding him quite sexy, he’s a genius.
He spends most of his time in a dressing gown, just like I do, and he’s rigged up a gin still in his tent so he can enjoy off-duty martinis in the desert.
He seduces all the nurses. He’s a wisenheimer. He tweaks the nose of authority and stands against meanness.
In one episode, when asked about his dressing gown by a colonel, he says “well I tried sleeping in my uniform, but the medals kept sticking in me.”
And thats’ the thing. He has medals. He can be a slob because, like Sherlock Holmes, he’s lightyears ahead of anyone else. He’s a great wit, a happy drunk, and a lounge lizard – but he’s also an excellent surgeon, which is how he gets away with it all.
I love him. He’s the Bugs Bunny of the Korean War. Which doesn’t sound sexy, but somehow it is.
I love you, Hawkeye. My new idol. I’m sorry it took me so long to find you.
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About Robert Wringham
Robert Wringham is the editor of New Escapologist. He also writes books and articles. Read more at wringham.co.uk