350,000 quid

I really can’t get enough of Dear Jeremy, the career advice column in The Guardian. Reading about other people’s work problems (from petty office politics to tedious career choices) is a good way to remember the Great Terror from which I narrowly escaped. It can only keep me on my toes, eh?

This week’s column features a most escapological conundrum. A fellow wants to escape his day job with £350,000 of assets. He plans to invest it in a new business of his own devising: a bed-and-breakfast hotel.

While his adventurous spirit is admirable, a friend really should take the chap by the lapels and say something along the lines of “ARE YOU CRAZY? THREE AND A HALF HUNDRED GRAND IS THE ESCAPE FUND OF A LIFETIME! SEVERAL LIFETIMES IF YOU’RE FRUGAL!”

To have raised such a handsome battery of wealth (and presumably to be debt-free) seems to be a case of “mission accomplished” to me. I certainly wouldn’t invest it in such a financially risky and time- and energy-consuming endeavor as a B&B. Hasn’t he seen Fawlty Towers? Out of the frying pan and into the fire.

I suppose it depends on his overheads: the affluent consumer lifestyle is an expensive commitment. I’d just curb my consumer desires, retire at once, and spend the money slowly on top-notch cakes for the next fifty years.

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About

Robert Wringham is a humorist and the editor-in-chief of New Escapologist.

One Response to “350,000 quid”

  1. Ish says:

    Hmm, maybe I should start reading job advice columns so that I don’t feel that bad about still being holed up in a cubicle. =P

    It’s funny — I just read somewhere that instead of asking what you would do if you suddenly hit the lottery (which just sets us up for disappointment and wallowing), we should be asking ‘What would I do if I didn’t win the lottery?’. It’ll help us figure out what we would really love to do faster. =)

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